I don’t read Cosmopolitan, but my attention was brought to the February 2010 issue one insomniatic night by the internetz. The articles title immediately sent up red flags in my brain: Are you turning your man into a girlie man?
The offensiveness begins immediately with the writer, Molly Triffin, painting a portrait of a girlie man and his girlfriend or wife who has turned him into a limp dicked shadow of a man. Its apparently unheard of for a man to want to take an exercise class, to watch a show headed by women (my husband likes Gilmore Girls more than I do), and vegetarian fare. Despite the article being prefaced with how its good for gender roles to blur (to a point), its hard to believe thats more than a disclaimer or afterthought so that people like me dont get uppity.
To some degree, this is a good thing we obviously dont want to revert back to 50s sex stereotypes but theres a point where it goes to far
Oh really? Its not so obvious to me. There are several examples within the article that reinforce archaic stereotypes, and very little acknowledgement of how we all cross gender barriers all the time. Even when strict gender roles were in place, femininity and masculinity are not solid things chained to ones genitals. Any transgender or genderfluid person could tell you that much. (You know, if their existence was recognized in a positive, respectful way. Ever.) Or why didnt the article mention what a great thing it is that a man can desire to take yoga classes and act on that desire because were not stuck in the Middle Ages?
I mean, why didnt she just say it: Are you turning your man into a FAG?
The real issue of the article should have been is that its unhealthy to try and push anything on another human being. Its unhealthy to spend every day all day with that person. Its unhealthy to expect that person to make changes in his/her/their activities when you will not ever do the same. This was touched on toward the end of the article, so in a way, I agree with the advice. Try to be fair and remember that maintaining a sense of individuality will keep you both happy. Its how Triffin stumbled into that area that I find appalling